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Dick Durbin is not pleased

You’re just now figuring this shit out ?

Sen. Dick Durbin (D-Ill.) has been battling the banks the last few weeks in an effort to get 60 votes lined up for bankruptcy reform. He’s losing.

On Monday night in an interview with a radio host back home, he came to a stark conclusion: the banks own the Senate.

“And the banks — hard to believe in a time when we’re facing a banking crisis that many of the banks created — are still the most powerful lobby on Capitol Hill. And they frankly own the place,” he said on WJJG 1530 AM’s “Mornings with Ray Hanania.” Progress Illinois picked up the quote.

Really?  You’ve just come to the conclusion that the banks own Washington because they oppose this bill?

You didn’t think the banks owned Washington when politicians got rid of all the regulation that was in place for 50 years?  You didn’t think the banks owned Washington when they got bailed out during the Savings and Loans scandal?  You didn’t think the banks owned Washington when they said, “Fuck you” and gave out huge bonuses this year?

Jesus fucking Christ.

Dick Durbin, you’re a goddamn idiot.  How the hell do you still have a job?   I mean, if you’re just now realizing the banks own Washington, what else haven’t you realized?   Do you still think Iraq has WMDs?  Do you still think there’s a link between Al Qaeda and Saddam Hussein?  Do you still think Ronald Reagan was kept in the dark about Iran-Contra?

Goddammit.  You’ve been a member of Congress since January 3, 1983, so you know the banks own Washington.  You also know that Wall Street owns Washington, the Pharmaceutical industry owns Washington, the Military owns Washington, the Prison industry owns Washington, and the Prostitution industry owns Washington.

So quit acting like this is a huge surprise, and get back to doing your goddamn job – fucking over minorities, giving billions of dollars to Wall Street, and choosing which country we bomb next.

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How do you like Arlen Specter now?

Because the Democrats are one step closer to a filibuster-proof majority in the Senate.

Pennsylvania Sen. Arlen Specter will switch his party affiliation from Republican to Democrat and announced today that he will run in 2010 as a Democrat, according to a statement he released this morning.

Specter’s decision would give Democrats a 60 seat filibuster proof majority in the Senate assuming Democrat Al Franken is eventually sworn in as the next senator from Minnesota. (Former senator Norm Coleman is appealing Franken’s victory in the state Supreme Court.)

Suck on that you stupid fucking Republicans.  With Arlen Specter’s help the Democrats will finally be able to fix the shit George Bush broke while he was in office.

With Arlen Specter’s help the Democrats can finally withdraw all our troops from the Middle East.  What?  Arlen Specter supports the Iraq and Afghanistan wars?  Alright, I guess that’s okay.  I mean, he’s entitled to his opinion.

But anyways, with Arlen Specter’s help the Democrats can finally help the unions.  What?   Arlen Specter’s against helping the unions?  Alright, I don’t understand, but who am I to judge?  I mean, maybe he has a good reason for it, I don’t know.

But, um, with Arlen Specter’s help the Democrats can finally regulate Wall Street.  What?   Arlen Specter’s one of the biggest Wall Street campaign recipients?

Goddammit.  Why the fuck did Arlen Specter switch to the Democratic party when his views are aligned with the Republican party?

Specter told reporters that he received a “bleak” poll Friday from his advisers that showed virtually no chance of him winning in the GOP primary next spring against Pat Toomey, a former Republican House member who recently led the conservative Club for Growth.

Are you fucking serious?  This cock sucker changed parties because he was about to lose his goddamn job?

God-fucking-dammit.

Why can’t normal people get away with the shit politicians do?  Why can’t someone who’s about to get fired go, “You know what?  I don’t feel like losing my job today, so I’ve decided to become the CEO and do the firing.”  Why can’t someone who wants some information go, “You know what?  I think that guy is banging my wife, so I’m going to tell my paperboy to strap him to a table and waterboard his ass until I get an answer.”  Why can’t someone who’s about to go bankrupt go, “You know what?  I don’t feel like being broke, so I’m going to create a failing business and get the government to bail me out with billions of dollars that I don’t have to pay back.”

Why do these rich, white stupid-ass motherfuckers get to make up the rules as they go along to benefit them, while they force every other poor son of a bitch to play by the first set of rules and continue to get fucked over?

For the love of God, could we please, PLEASE, have a crazy person storm the Capital while Congress is in session and blow these motherfuckers away?  For fuck’s sake, these are the assholes who are screwing you over.  Not illegal immigrants.

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What the fuck is this shit

You’ve just gotten a taste of how this torture shit is going to play out.

Liberal activists are pressing for the impeachment of federal Judge Jay Bybee over the Bush administration’s “torture memos” in part because there is virtually nothing that President Barack Obama, congressional Republicans or conservative Senate Democrats can do to stop the process from getting underway.

Ah, yes, the classic Washington “Us verses Them” bullshit.  Where the Democrats will say things like, “This is outrageous.  How is this man a federal judge?  He signed a memo giving permission to waterboard detainees, stick their heads in a box full of bugs, slam their heads into a wall, slap them, and deprive them of sleep.  How can this man say he will uphold the Constitution when he shat on its chest 7 years ago?”

And the Republicans will respond with, “Fuck that.  There were high ranking Democrats who knew we were torturing those nasty brown pieces of shit in Iraq and Afghanistan.  Did they object?  Fuck no.  They were too busy getting paid thousands of dollars by lobbyists to care about the fucked up shit we were doing to people.  If they’re going to impeach anyone it should be their own goddamn selves.”

Think I’m lying?  Read this shit :

Republicans are pushing back. The Judiciary Committee’s ranking member, Rep. Lamar Smith (R-Texas), warned that Democratic leaders also would also come under scrutiny. He said Podesta should also pursue House Speaker Nancy Pelosi over her lack of action following classified briefings she received on the interrogation techniques.

“If he wants to be absolutely fair, he ought to ask the speaker to resign as well,” Smith told POLITICO on Monday. “Clearly, any attorney should be able to offer their legal advice and give their best counsel to a president and to an administration without fear of someone trying to reach back and impeach them when they get to a higher office.”

So it looks like nothing is going to change.  Rich, powerful white people will continue to torture  poor brown people.  The media will continue to make this a Republicans vs. Democrats issue.  And Americans could care less because they are too busy worrying about the stupid fucking swine flu.

You know…business as usual…

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Fuck the swine flu, this couple is getting some

We’re all fucked.

Health officials around the world worked to contain what appears to be a spreading swine flu outbreak early Monday, while one out of every five residents of Mexico’s most populous city wore masks to protect themselves against the virus.

Mexico seems to be the epicenter of the outbreak, where as many as 103 deaths are thought to have been caused by swine flu, the country’s health minister said. An additional 1,614 reported cases have been reported in the country.

So far, however, only 18 cases have been confirmed by laboratory tests in Mexico and reported to the World Health Organization.

The United States stepped up preparations for a possible epidemic of the virus after 20 cases were confirmed, and Canada announced its first cases of the virus Sunday — six mild cases.

How does this happen?  How does a deadly virus like this spread throughout the world when we’re living in the most medically advanced period in human history?  (I’m sure some people will say the Spanish flu happened during the most medically advanced period in human history, and those people can choke to death on a horse’s cock.)

I have a theory, and it doesn’t involve the Republicans slashing 900 million dollars from the stimulus budget for pandemic preparation.

But before I get to my theory, I need present the facts.

FACT:

On April 16, President Obama went down to Mexico to support the Mexican government in its fight against the drug cartels.  During a break at a press conference, the Mexican President Felipe Calderon leans over and whispers to Obama, “Come on Mr. President, just legalized the goddamn drugs so we can end this stupid fucking war.  For Christ’s sake, you fucking smoked weed.  How bad can it be?”

President Obama laughs and whispers back, “Naw man, I don’t do that anymore.  Besides, this drug war thingy is making a lot of powerful people extremely rich.  If I fuck with them, then they fuck with me and I can’t fucking have that.  But don’t worry about the drug cartels.  I’ve got a plan.”

FACT:

Felipe presses Obama for more information but doesn’t get any.  Felipe calls Obama a “stupid nigger” under his breath.

FACT:

On April 23 the Washington Post informs the public that the military “lost” a horse virus with a Spanish name.   Its symptoms include a mild flu-like illness but can also cause brain inflammation and death.

Now here’s my theory.

While Obama was getting a sloppy Mexican blow job from Felipe Calderon, a team of Navy Seals parachuted into a small Mexican village where the notorious Mexican drug lord Joaquin Guzman was rumored to be banging some 13-year-old girl.   The Seals administered the “lost” virus to the entire village through some sort of new C4-like explosion device and then left.  The virus takes between 3 to 7 days to infected its victim, giving Obama enough time to cum in  Felipe’s mouth and get home before Michelle suspects anything.

Obama then gives out the antidote to Texas, California, Kansas, Ohio, and New York since he knows people in those states will get infected.  After those states administer the antidote to the people who will get sick, Obama then will create a massive panic and will swiftly move to create an One World Government which will enslave humanity forever.

I’m just fucking with you.  There’s no way Barack Obama would use a chemical weapon to take out a drug lord in Mexico so he could create an one world government.  That’s just crazy.

Everybody knows this swine flu pandemic is just a globial cover-up for the impending zombie apocalypse.

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Happy Iraqi Children

Looks like Iraq is starting to see some improvements.  Naw, I’m just fucking with ya.

Suicide bombers in Iraq launched two deadly attacks Thursday, killing at least 55 people in Diyala province and at least 28 people in Baghdad, an Interior Ministry official said.

Four other people were killed in two other incidents, making Thursday the deadliest day in Iraq this year, with at least 87 dead and more than 120 wounded.

Jesus Christ.  87 people killed in one day?  Do you think those people are counted toward the 87,215 Iraqi citizens that have been killed since 2005?

What am I talking about?  Who the fuck cares about the number of Iraqi citizens killed in this war?  We have a job to do.

We have to continue to pour billions of dollars into Iraq.  We have to continue to risk our soldiers’ lives in a war based on lies.  We have to continue to kick down random Iraqis’ doors and kidnap them.  We have to continue to torture Iraqis for information about upcoming attacks they know nothing about.  We have to continue to spread democracy throughout the Middle East.

We have to continue to fuck over Americans by not providing them with health care, better education, better housing, more food, and more jobs.  We have to continue to sacrifice for those people who are profiting from this war.  We have to continue to give up our freedoms for the illusion of safety.  We have to continue to ignore how much our government doesn’t care about us.

We have to continue to stand by and do nothing as our nation collapses before our eyes.

Update:  Looks like things are continuing to get better.

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This person wants to know

Do any of you know what WW2-era Germany and Italy and present-day Russia, Cuba, Venezuela, Peru, Iran, Saudi Arabia, Zimbabwe, North Korea, and China have in common with the United States?  It isn’t torture.  And it isn’t the slaughtering of thousands of innocent people either.  Give up?

It’s propaganda!!!

What propaganda?  The propaganda David Barstow reported on and won a Pulitzer Prize for.

Awarded to David Barstow of The New York Times for his tenacious reporting that revealed how some retired generals, working as radio and television analysts, had been co-opted by the Pentagon to make its case for the war in Iraq, and how many of them also had undisclosed ties to companies that benefited from policies they defended.

Of course some people will say, “The White House telling the Pentagon to hire retired high-ranking generals and putting them on ABC, NBC, CBS, Fox News, MSNBC, and CNN, and having them read talking points that the Pentagon prepared just for them so they could drum-up support for the Iraq war, which in turn helped the companies they worked for, isn’t called  propaganda.  It’s called patriotism.”

And those people are fucking wrong.

You see, propaganda is the dissemination of information aimed at influencing the opinions or behaviors of people. Propaganda often presents facts selectively (thus lying by omission) to encourage a particular synthesis, or gives loaded messages in order to produce an emotional rather than rational response to the information presented. The desired result is a change of the attitude toward the subject in the target audience to further a political agenda.

It’s what the White House used to gain support for the Iraq war.  It’s what the Germans used to gain support for the Holocaust.  It’s what North Korea uses to make its citizens think Kim Jong il pisses gold.  It’s what China and Russia uses to control their populations.

Of course those countries don’t admit to using propaganda.  They like to hide behind the “patriotism” statement just like retarded Americans do.

So if you’re one of those people who doesn’t believe our government uses propaganda, and the Main Stream Media really cares about America – please do the world a favor and follow in David Kellermann’s footsteps. Because we don’t need dumb motherfuckers like you reproducing.

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I'd bone Megan Fox

Because I’m sick of looking at dudes all day.

Looks like Obama is sick of being called a pussy.  [Daily Kos]

I really really enjoy this webcomic.  [Overcompensating]

Where was this outrage when George Bush kissed the Saudi Prince on the lips?  [Pissed On Politics]

Goddammit.  I don’t want another Elizabeth Hasselbeck.  [The Pajama Pundit]

Here’s a couple ideas on where you could hide your stash.  [Tiggyblog]

Looks like I found someone who hates Rush Limbaugh more than me.  [Zirgar]

Fuck the Department of Homeland Security.  [Blanca DeBree Blog]

I wonder how the rest of his day went.  [The Afternoon Break]

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