You’ve got to be fucking kidding me.

Tired of the government bailing out banks? Get ready for this: officials may soon ask banks to bail out the government.

Senior regulators say they are seriously considering a plan to have the nation’s healthy banks lend billions of dollars to rescue the insurance fund that protects bank depositors. That would enable the fund, which is rapidly running out of money because of a wave of bank failures, to continue to rescue the sickest banks.

So our government bails out Wall Street, then asks Wall Street to bail them out?

Goddammit.

I know I should go on some sort of rant about how fucking insane this is and how the American people should be bitching about this and not about ACORN, but I don’t have it in me.

So instead I’m going to drink a handle of Jack Daniels, drive my scooter to the nearest Bank of American and sling feces at every cocksucker that walks in and/or out.

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Tags: Bail Out, FDIC, Fuck Wall Street, I hope a catch someone in the face with my poo
Comments (5)

Here’s a list of things you can investigate after you’re done crucifying ACORN for failing to recognize a fake pimp:

• Blackwater
• KBR
• Halliburton
• Triple Canopy
• Boeing
• Lockheed Martin
• Federal Reserve
• Wall Street Bailout
• Goldman Sachs
• AIG
• Bank of America
• Citigroup
• CIA torture program
• Politicization of the Department of Justice
• Betsy McCaughey
• Karl Rove
• WMD in Iraq
• 9 billion dollars lost in Iraq
• Cheney’s Energy Task Force Meeting

Of course you aren’t going to investigate any of these things because you”re too busy destroying an organization that’s received 53 million dollars over 15 years and helps poor colored people.

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Tags: ACORN, Blackwater, Congress, Congress hates poor colored people, Dick Cheney, KBR
Comments (4)

They just used their producers to rally the crowd. There’s a huuuuuuuuuuge difference.

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Tags: 9/12 Rally, Fuck Fox News, Heidi Noonan, I've seen children finger paint better signs
Comments (3)

I’ll be first in line at Barnes and Nobles when this book comes out. [Democralypse Now]

Why would anyone want to conduct a survey about this? [From the Left]

Really? The Republicans have a trap for Democrats on health care? [Politics Daily]

What the hell is Producerism? [Hullabaloo]

I’ve never taken them seriously. [Pissed On Politics]

The only good thing that has come out of South Carolina is Stephen Colbert. [Daily Kos]

Remember kids, ACORN is code for niggers. [Crooks and Liars]

What the fuck is a pre-stress fracture? [Firedoglake]

I’m sure a lot of Southern white people agree with Limbaugh on this. [Think Progress]

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Tags: I wonder if baby was put into a corner after Swayze died, link dump
Comments (2)

Espically the stupid fat woman that cried tears of white gravy while being interviewed.

Ed. note -- The video is just under 10 minutes but it’s worth your time.

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Tags: 9/12, I fucking hate Glenn Beck, Stupid Americans, Tea Baggers
Comments (35)

First there was there was Joe Wilson shouting at the president on national TV, then there was the tea party people bitching about the country becoming communist/socialist/fascist, and now there’s this.

Creation, starring Paul Bettany, details Darwin’s “struggle between faith and reason” as he wrote On The Origin of Species. It depicts him as a man who loses faith in God following the death of his beloved 10-year-old daughter, Annie.

The film was chosen to open the Toronto Film Festival and has its British premiere on Sunday. It has been sold in almost every territory around the world, from Australia to Scandinavia.

However, US distributors have resolutely passed on a film which will prove hugely divisive in a country where, according to a Gallup poll conducted in February, only 39 per cent of Americans believe in the theory of evolution.

That’s right. Americans can watch movies about Hitler getting shot in the face 57 times, a little girl who is conceived so her parents can harvest her bone marrow, a movie glorifying the mafia, giant robots destroying everything, zombies eating people, talking rodents, a 100-year-old pedifile that drinks blood, and Jesus Christ getting tortured for 2 fucking hours. But a movie depecting the life of a scientist that gave the world the theory of evolution is too controversial.

Where’s the fucking logic in that? How can Americans approve of Sharon Stone flashing her pussy on a large screen and stabbing everyone with an ice pick, but deny a movie about Charles Darwin telling the world about evolution and natural selection?

Jesus Christ, I’m sick of all the retarded white fuckers in this country making the rest of us look bad. Everyone in the world looks at the United States has backward ultra-religious asshats that hate science because we believe in an imaginary man in the sky that created everything.

Fuck, now I know how black people feel when everyone assumes they’re gangstas and/or thugs.

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Tags: Charles Darwin, Fuck stupid white people, Science, Stupid Rednecks, Theory of evolution
Comments (9)

Yes, I know today is the eighth anniversary of 9/11. And yes, I know that 2,974 Americans died during 9/11. And yes, I know that our politicians, TV pundits, famous newspaper columnist, and famous radio personalities say we should never forget 9/11. But I want to put things into perspective.

So here is a list of things that have killed more Americans than 9/11:

• Prescription Drugs
• Aspirin
• Tobacco
• Televised Bowling
• Iraqi War
• Obesity
• Car crashes
• Alcohol
• Lifetime Channel
• Suicides
• Cancer
• Aids
• WNBA
• Heart Disease
• Handgun Accidents
• Suffocation
• Drowning
• Falls
• Grey’s Anatomy

Also, since 9/11, America is responsible for over 30,000 Iraqi civilian deaths and 20,000 Afghanistan civilian deaths.

So today while we beat our chest and proclaim to the world how we’re going to wipe those Muslim assholes off the face of the earth for attacking America, just remember this list and shut the fuck up.

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Tags: 9/11, War on Terror, When are we going to declare a War on Cars
Comments (8)