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It's funny cause it's true.

It's funny cause it's true.

That woman must really love her team. [Laci the Dog]

The CIA only misled Congress 5 times? [The Raw Story]

I wish I was a heroin dealer, because I would love to be put on the CIA payroll. [Pissed On Politics]

There’s nothing better than watching a redneck family dispute. [Democralypse Now]

Thank science I don’t live in Kansas. [Blanca DeBree]

I’m surprised it was only 30 Congressmen under investigation. [Washington Post]

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This guy always carries sex toys around..."just in case".

This man is always prepared.

Once again South Carolina shows the world how freaky its politicians are.

A deputy assistant attorney general who said he was on his lunch break when an officer found him with a stripper and sex toys in his sport utility vehicle has been fired, his boss said Wednesday.

Roland Corning, 66, a former state legislator, was in a secluded part of a downtown cemetery when an officer spotted him Monday, according to a police report obtained by The Associated Press under the Freedom of Information Act.

Now I know what you’re thinking, and no, this isn’t the best part of the article. This is the best part:

He then searched the SUV, where he found a Viagra pill and several sex toys, items Corning said he always kept with him, “just in case,” according to the report.

That’s what I’m talking about. You’ve always got to be prepared because you never know when some hot stripper wants you to take her to a cemetery and fuck her in the butt with an assortment of dildos. And you never know how long she wants to fuck so you have to have one Viagra pill just in case.

So can we cut Roland Corning some slack? I mean, sure he obviously had to pay this women to fuck him. And sure, he’s prosecuted plenty of people who’ve paid for sex. But this man is 66-years-old and he’s banging a 18-year-old woman while teasing her butthole with a couple of rubber dicks. He deserves our respect.

And I’m giving it to him. Because when I’m 66-year-old man I hope some 18-year-old woman is so hard up for money that she’s willing to swallow her pride by swallowing my dick.

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Harry Reid

Since you’ve decided to embrace the corporate cock that is shoved in your asshole by letting states opt-out of the public option, here are some more things I think you should let states opt-out of:

  • funding the Afghan war
  • funding the Iraq war
  • funding the military
  • funding the Wall Street bailouts
  • funding the War on Drugs
  • funding farm subsidies
  • funding oil subsidies
  • funding No Child Left Behind
  • funding Senators’ salaries
  • funding Congressmen’s salaries
  • funding the Supreme Court Justices’ salaries



But of course you aren’t going to let states opt-out of those things because it benefits you and your corporate owners.

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He's got huge fucking balls.

You'd be smiling too if you had balls as big as the moon.

Because he tells it like it is.

Republicans and Democrats slammed Rep. Alan Grayson (D-Fla.) for calling Linda Robertson, an adviser to Fed Chairman Ben Bernanke, a “K Street whore” in a month-old radio interview that circulated on Capitol Hill Monday night.

The remarks are the latest to surface in a string of controversial statements by Grayson, who said on the Alex Jones radio show that he believes Robertson, a former Enron lobbyist, is not qualified to pass judgment on intricate financial matters.

Alan Grayson has everything you could ask for in a politician: independently wealthy,  good looking, smart, liberal, huge balls, and Jewish.

God, I’m getting hard just thinking about the time he called Dick Cheney a vampire. Er…I just remembered I left the coffee pot on in the bathroom. So, um,  I need to go turn it off before it burns down the entire neighborhood.

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Yep, this guy is a journalist.

Yep, this guy is a journalist.

How many cocks did David Gregory suck before he got to host Meet The Press? 10? 50? 100? I’m leaning toward 100, because this guy isn’t hosting based on his journalistic abilities.

For the past several months I’ve watched this lanky asshole ask soft, pointless questions about health care reform, the war in Afghanistan, the war in Iraq, and the Wall Street bailouts. I’ve seen him quote ‘journalist’ like Charles Krauthammer and Peggy Noonan while reading Newt Gingrich’s latest tweets.

So, again, I have to ask, how many cocks did he suck to get his job? Because I’m willing to suck twice as many cocks in order to become the new host. Plus, I’ll swallow.

Why am I willing to sacrifice my precious gag reflex? Because I want a crack at his guests.

I want to ask John McCain the real reason why he’s trying to pass an anti-Net Neutrality bill. I want to ask Orrin Hatch why he wants Obama to force the Justice Department to look into college football’s bowl system but not into George Bush’s torture program. And I want to ask Joe Scarborough what really happened to Lori Klausutis.

That’s why I’m willing to gag on hundreds of cocks. I want to make those corrupt, sadistic corporate whores sweat on national TV. And if that means I have to swallow several pints of rich, white man semen, so be it.

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Comments (8)

christina_hendricks

How is Tucker Carlson still employed? [Glenn Greenwald]

I will never understand gun enthusiasts. [Laci the Dog]

Then why is the GOP able to dominate political discussions? [The Political Carnival]

RIP GeoCities. [Crib From This]

I wouldn’t say this is Obama’s worst decision, but it’s in the top 5. [Infidel753]

This is the greatest calender ever. [Zirgar's]

Why won’t this man just die? [Democralypse Now]

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Comments (2)

shut_the_fuck_up_cunt

Why? Because only a big, fat cunt would whine about shit like this:

Former President George H.W. Bush told CBS News that President Obama “is entitled to civil treatment and intellectual honesty when it comes to critics.”

In the radio interview, Mr. Bush said the volume of criticism aimed at him when he was president was not as “day in and day out.”

The Republican elder statesman said, “It’s not just the right.” He complained, “there are plenty of people on the left.”

While he said he does not believe in personal name-calling, he singled out MSNBC personalities Keith Olbermann and Rachel Maddow calling them “sick puppies.”

“The way they treat my son and anyone who’s opposed to their point of view is just horrible,” Mr. Bush said.

Let me get this straight: George H. W. Bush tells the radio disc jockey he doesn’t believe in personal name-calling, then he calls Keith Olbermann and Rachel Maddow “sick puppies”? Is this guy fucking nuts or is he developing Alzheimer’s like his good friend Ronald Reagan?

And why the fuck should we care about what this old piece of shit has to say about the current political climate? He’s the slimy motherfucker who used those racist Willie Horton ads to scare white people into voting for him.

And how the hell does this man not see what a colossal fuck up his son’s presidency was? I mean, his son led us into two wars that we’re still fighting, started the Wall Street bailouts, tortured prisoners, jailed innocent civilians, created Gitmo, illegally spied on Americans, granted immunity to telecommunication companies that spied on Americans, politicized the Justice Department, and a whole lot of other shit we won’t ever know about because of the retarded “state secrets privilege”.

Jesus Christ.

Someone needs to punch this old, dried-up cunt in his fucking head the next time he starts bitching like a high school parent who hates the way the other parents talk about his kid’s football performance -  even though the only reason his kid is on the goddamn team is because he gave the coach his job.

And while I’m asking favors, could someone also punch his ugly fucking wife? I can’t stand that fat, silver haired bitch.

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