Wed 18 Nov, 2009
Naw, I’m just fucking with you. He’s probably embarrassed :
There’s a new slogan making its way onto car bumpers and across the Internet. It reads simply: “Pray for Obama: Psalm 109:8”
A nice sentiment?
Maybe not.
The psalm reads, “Let his days be few; and let another take his office.”
Presidential criticism through witty slogans is nothing new. Bumper stickers, t-shirts, and hats with “1/20/09” commemorated President Bush’s last day in office.
But the verse immediately following the psalm referenced is a bit more ominous: “Let his children be fatherless, and his wife a widow.”
Someone please help me out, because I’m confused with this religion stuff. Alright, now if you’re a Christian then that means you believe in Jesus Christ, right? And if you believe in Jesus Christ then you follow the New Testament, right? Then why the fuck are these Christians quoting the Old Testament?
See, I always thought that Jesus taught his followers to love their enemies. But I’m not getting that vibe from these people. They seem to get off on the whole ‘eye for an eye’ thing. Which is fine if they practiced Judaism. But they don’t, and that pisses me off.
Why? Because they’re able to do/say awful things to people they don’t like because of the Old Testament while not feeling guilty about it because of the New Testament. And it’s fucking bullshit.
Either pick the Old Testament or the New Testament, Judaism or Christianity, you crazy fucks, because you can’t have both. You can’t claim gay people are evil because of some verse in Leviticus and then say you’re free from sin because of some verse in Mathew…wait, I’ve never heard those shitheads quoting Matthew. Or any other New Testament verse besides Revelation.
So how the fuck do these people claim to be Christians? And why the fuck do people call them Christians?
Goddammit, this shit is a thousands times more confusing than watching Lost on LSD.
14 Responses to “Jesus would be proud
”
Leave a Reply
Tags: I don't understand religion, Obama, Religion, Stupid people piss me off, White PeopleComments (14)
Laci the Dog says:
It’s called the priesthood of all believers, which means you pick up the Bible and interpret it however the fuck you want to. That’s how you come up with things like Tony Alamo and the Branch Davidians.
That same moronic concept has been applied to law, which is how something that was supposed to guarantee a Swiss Style Military that was under civilian control to prevent a large standing army. The Standing Army would be used for Tyrannical purposes, such as invading some country on false pretexts.
Sort of like what happened in Iraq.
Strangely, the “Supporters of the Second Amendment” didn’t scream about that, but about DC’s gun laws that were locally legislated. They also want to make sure the insane have access to firearms.
Doesn’t THAT make sense after Fort Hood?
PQ8 says:
I think religion is outdated. Kind of like cassette tapes.
Phuck Politics says:
@Laci the Dog – They also want to make sure the insane have access to firearms.
Wow, really? They honestly believe insane people should have firearms?
@PQ8 – I would say religion is as outdated as eight-tracks.
PharmDude says:
Certainly you’ve seen a fat, shirtless redneck at a NASCAR race on TV before. You know the one, he’s holding the “John 3:16″ sign… Oh yeah, and he’s drunk.
ZIRGAR says:
Dang, where’s your sense of humor? It’s just a little jest at Mr. Obama’s expense. You only see it as a threat because that’s what you want to see. Me, I see satire. Just some good clean fun. So, lighten up, you liberal loser!
cft says:
Either pick the Old Testament or the New Testament, Judaism or Christianity, you crazy fucks, because you can’t have both. You can’t claim gay people are evil because of some verse in Leviticus and then say you’re free from sin because of some verse in Mathew…
The British actor Stephen Fry once pointed out how strange it is that so-called Christian Fundamentalists would premise their hostility to homosexuality on the Old Testament, considering that it is much more emphatic about lots of other things, not least of which are dietary restrictions. I mean, who ever heard of a Christian Fundamentalist keeping kosher?
cft says:
Someone please help me out, because I’m confused with this religion stuff. Alright, now if you’re a Christian then that means you believe in Jesus Christ, right? And if you believe in Jesus Christ then you follow the New Testament, right? Then why the fuck are these Christians quoting the Old Testament?
Although you may have intended this as a rhetorical question, I would like to offer for consideration the following two-word historical/theological explanation:
John Calvin
Harrison says:
The Jews don’t have Part II like the Christians do but, like every sequel, sometimes you have to look to Part I for a good story.
Phuck Politics says:
@PharmDude – My good sir, I live in the South, and I see those fat bastards all the time.
@Zirgar – I guess the good Lord didn’t bless me with a funny bone.
@cft – The British actor Stephen Fry once pointed out how strange it is that so-called Christian Fundamentalists would premise their hostility to homosexuality on the Old Testament, considering that it is much more emphatic about lots of other things, not least of which are dietary restrictions. I mean, who ever heard of a Christian Fundamentalist keeping kosher?
I love Stephen Fry. I’m read a couple of his books, and I think that man is a genius.
And Christian Fundamentalist won’t keep kosher because they love their goddamn bacon too much.
Although you may have intended this as a rhetorical question, I would like to offer for consideration the following two-word historical/theological explanation:
John Calvin
If I could go back in time and kill one person (excluding Hitler) it would be John ‘Everyone’s-Going-To-Hell’ Calvin.
@Harrison – So the Christians pulled a George Lucas?
PQ8 says:
“@Harrison – So the Christians pulled a George Lucas?”
LOL
I live in the south too…I have to deal with family members who are obsessed with hating the government for only reasons Fox News tells them to, and they also throw baptism around all over the place and love to drink. They also say they are Republican, but then give me the definition of libertarians. I’m glad there only half-family….my other family is all mormon…but they are 100x easier to be around, honestly. Man, religion sucks. Like I’m going to listen to someone who believes in fairy tales. They might as well be playing Dungeons and Dragons. I’m not the kind of person to tell someone there completely wrong, but ugg…I know some excellent, 5 star people who are highly Christian….but I don’t get why they need that to be great people!
stunatra says:
You said it brother. They pick and choose what they want to believe and will use the bible to suit them.
I find that psalm humorous though, the first verse anyway.
“@PQ8 – I would say religion is as outdated as eight-tracks.”
LOL, that made me L-O-L. And may I say, the 8 tracks were the worst media invented, along with the cassette tapes.
PQ8 says:
I wish I would have said that…but 8 tracks are beyond my time…
Phuck Politics says:
@PQ8 – What part of the South? And it looks like we are in the same boat, except for the Mormon part.
Every time I go home my parents try to argue with me about gay marriage, abortion, health care, and a whatever else is the topic of the day on Fox News. It makes me want to slit my throat.
I wish I would have said that…but 8 tracks are beyond my time…
Eight-tracks are way before my time as well.
@Stunatra – You said it brother. They pick and choose what they want to believe and will use the bible to suit them.
Which is one of the many reasons why I hate religion.
PQ8 says:
A small town in Virginia…I’ve lived here for 8 years and it seems to go downhill every year.
And yeah, same thing. Luckily it’s only my step-family that is crazy, for the most part. My mormon family doesn’t care, lol. I actually think Mormons get a lot of flack. I still think it’s stupid, but I hate when they crack jokes about stuff like caffeinated beverage consumption when Pepsi is a huge hit over there. I don’t think coffee is though. Crazy world! But, at least they don’t worship alcohol like the step family does…and Nascar…and Fox News…and hating anything different at all…