Elected Officals |

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Our government doesn’t like sex in America but they want to spread the love overseas.

In an effort to win over fickle warlords and chieftains in Afghanistan and get information from them, CIA officials are handing out Viagra pills in exchange for their cooperation, the Washington Post reports.

“Whatever it takes to make friends and influence people – whether it’s building a school or handing out Viagra,” an agency operative, speaking on the condition of anonymity, told the Post.

That’s right people, we have spent over one trillion dollars and sacrificed over 4,000 American lives so men who can’t get it up in the Middle East can fuck.

Jesus Christ.

Do they really think this will help with the “War on Terror”? Do they think those men are going to come together and say, “Guys, we might have been wrong about America. They knew our dicks weren’t working and instead of taking away our heroin and forcing us to exercise, like they do to their own people, they’ve decided to give us a pill that allows us to stay hard up to four hours. And it isn’t that cheap ass Cialis they’re always showing during Monday Night Football. I say we just stop fight and start fucking. Who’s with me?”

Our soldiers are fucked and you can except the number of their deaths to go up. Why? Because we’ve just told the entire world that the men we are fighting can’t get hard. Do you have any idea how damaging that is to the male ego? They are now the laughing stock of the world.

Plus this shows us how fucking stupid our government is. They want us to believe that these evil, ruthless, godless men will someone how get a nuclear weapon on the black market and blow up a good portion of our great nation, yet they don’t know where to go to get an erection pill?

Give me a fucking break. Our “elected” officials are nothing more than rich, arrogant, stupid, pussified, pieces of shit and they should be taken out back, skull fucked and shot at the base of the neck.

If there was a God this would happen but since there isn’t, I’ll settle for an underage sex sting…