Mon 13 Jul, 2009
Tell me the New York Times is lying.
The Central Intelligence Agency withheld information about a secret counterterrorism program from Congress for eight years on direct orders from former Vice President Dick Cheney, the agency’s director, Leon E. Panetta, has told the Senate and House intelligence committees, two people with direct knowledge of the matter said Saturday.
You know what? This can’t be the whole story. I’m sure Dick Cheney has a good reason for doing this. I’m going to withhold judgment until I see what he has to say.
Efforts to reach Mr. Cheney were unsuccessful.
Okay, Dick was busy. Maybe him and his daughter went to see that new Bruno movie and he turned off his cell phone because he didn’t want to ruin the movie for everybody. Yeah, that’s something Dick would do. He would make sure that his cell phone was off because he respects people too much, and that’s why they couldn’t get in touch with him. Besides, I’m sure he told his family what to say when the New York Times called.
Efforts to reach Mr. Cheney through relatives were unsuccessful
Okay, maybe they were busy too. Maybe they were out on the beach, or at some horse ranch. I mean, they can’t sit around all day waiting on the New York Times to call. They’ve got shit to do. But again, I’m sure Dick knew that. That’s why he left a message with his associates to give to the New York Times.
Efforts to reach Mr. Cheney through associates were unsuccessful.
Oh goddammit. Really Dick? Really? Your fucking ass as been all over the goddamn place talking about how this country is unsafe, and how Obama is a pussy, and how gay people should be allowed to marry, but when a major story comes out saying you’ve been running a secret CIA program that you’ve kept from Congress you suddenly drop off the face of the earth?
You know what you are Dick? You’re a big, fat, wart covered pussy that sits around all day signing off on torture techniques and secret assassination squads, and telling everyone that you can do whatever the fuck you want because the country is under attack. Until someone calls you out on all your bullshit. Then you shove a tampon up your fucking twat and run off crying like Michael Jackson’s daughter.
I cannot wait until some fat hung motherfucker bends you over his prison bed and ass fucks you so hard that every time you cough you taste his children.
Tags: Fuck Congress, Fuck Dick Cheney, Fuck the CIA
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