These are the people who voted against gay marriage because their imaginary friend in the sky considers it a “sin” on par with cutting your hair, shaving your beard, having long hair, eating shell fish, eating pork, working on the Sabbath, wearing mix fiber clothes, being around your wife while she’s bleeding from the vagina, cheating on your wife, thinking about cheating on your wife, swearing on the Bible, and masturbating.

Of course these fat, ignorant pieces of shit aren’t going to outlaw any of those “sins” because their pastor/church leader/favorite politician/favorite Fox News media personality hasn’t told them to.  (Which is sad because I would love to see ads against masturbating.)

But if there’s one positive thing I can take away from this it’s that the South doesn’t have a monopoly on fat, ignorant, hateful retards.

Wait, now that I think about it, that’s not positive at all. Because that means fat, ignorant, hateful retards are spreading their seed. Which means they’re slowly taking over the world. Which means NASCAR and Jeff Dunham are going to continue to get popular.

FUCK.

I really wish Hitler would’ve slaughtered fat, ignorant, hateful retards that believe an invisible man wants them to deny civil rights to a group of individuals because they are different instead of slaughtering Jews. Because if he did that then he would have gone down in history as the greatest man that ever lived.

But unfortunately he did slaughter millions of Jews and we’re stuck with NASCAR, Jeff Dunham and these fucking asshats’ stupid fucking invisible man in the clouds.

And that means I’m either going to have to continue to smoke my weed, drink my scotch, and jerk-off to my 80’s porn, or shove my head in a wood chipper.

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Tags: Christians, Gay Marriage, I hate old people, I wish God hated retards
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