Iran's about to get fucked up.

I was getting worried we forgot about Iran:

Egypt allowed at least one Israeli and 11 American warships to pass through the Suez Canal as an Iranian flotilla approaches Gaza. Egypt closed the canal to protect the ships with thousands of soldiers, according to the British-based Arabic language newspaper Al Quds al-Arabi.

[...]

Despite Egypt’s reported refusal to block the canal to Iranian boats, the clearance for the American-Israeli fleet may be a warning to Iran it may face military opposition if the Iranian Red Crescent ship continues on course to Gaza.

The warships may exercise the right to inspect the Iranian boat for the illegal transport or weapons. Newsweek reported that Egyptian authorities could stop the ship for weeks, using technicalities such as requiring that any official documents be translated from Farsi into Arabic.

The magazine’s website also reported that the Iranian navy is the weakest part of its armed forces. Tehran has already backed down from announced intentions to escort the Iranian ships with “volunteer marines” from the Iranian Revolutionary Guards.

Okay, so there’s my guess as to what’s going to happen in the Red Sea. Either one of our ships or Israel’s ships are going to conveniently blow up when they confront Iran’s ships. This will give us an excuse to go all Michael Bay on Iran’s ass. Then our government will institute operation “Butt Fuck Iran”. Once that happens the media will get down on its knees and blow anyone who works for the White House, State Department, CIA, Homeland Security, and/or any private mercenary company while our elect officials sink another 3 trillion dollars into a worthless war while denying hundreds of thousands of Americans unemployed benefits.

Of course I could be wrong and the US. and Israel warships could be going to help Iran bring materhahah. I’m sorry. I couldn’t keep it together. We all know Iran’s fucked.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=Qc1TM7FKD8k

I’ve got a crippling hangover today, so enjoy this video of Somali pirates Israeli commandos murdering a bunch of people trying to bring aid to Palestinians.

I’m so happy my tax dollars fund those assholes.

Openly gay people might be allowed to join the military.

In an overlooked YouTube video posted on Friday, a spokesman for Barack Obama said the president-elect is committed to ending the policy that bars openly gay men and women from serving in the U.S. armed forces.

In a response to a question on the Web site Change.gov asking whether Obama would get rid of the “don’t ask, don’t tell” policy, Obama spokesman Robert Gibbs said: “You don’t hear politicians give a one-word answer much. But it’s ‘Yes.’”

Basically Barack Obama is saying, “Faggots can’t marrying but they can die.  Let’s get rid of this ‘Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell’ rule.”

Fuck you Barack Obama.  Why’s it okay for gay people to legally kill someone for their country but not legally marry someone they love?  It’s because you’re fucking pathetic pussy.  You’re no better than any other politician in Washington. You said whatever the retards wanted to hear so you would get elected.  And now you’re going to do whatever the fuck your told to do, just like governor bush.

The sad thing is people will get on their knees and blow Obama because they think this is a positive step forward for gay rights.  They’ll say things like, “It’s about time the military got rid of this stupid rule.” and “This is a great day for the gay rights movement.”  CNN and MSNBC will have a hard time keeping their dicks in their pants as they tell the people how proud they are to be an American while Sean Hannity and Bill O’Reilly will shout about how the secular left are destroying the fabric of this country.

News flash folks…it’s all bullshit.

The only reason why Barack Obama wants to get rid of this rule is because shit is going down in the Middle East.  Israel is attacking Palestine and bombing Lebanon.  Pakistan is about to go to war with India while their country is collapsing.  Russia is cutting off gas to Europe.  Oh and don’t forget about the two wars we are fighting that will never end.  The military is running out of people willing to go thousands of miles away and die, so they are being forced to end this fucking policy.

Of course I find it funny that after years of being treated as second class citizens, our military needs the gay community to continue its unjust wars.  I just hope gay people tell them where to shove it….

How does he have a job?

Federal Reserve Chairman Ben Bernanke said Tuesday that President-elect Barack Obama’s proposed fiscal stimulus package could help the economy, but he added that additional bailouts of financial institutions may also be needed to bring about a sustained economic recovery.

Bernanke, speaking in London, said in his prepared remarks that the nearly $800 billion plan being discussed by the incoming Obama administration and the newly elected Congress “could provide a significant boost to economic activity.” He did not comment on or endorse any specifics of the nearly $800 billion.

Why the fuck is he over in London?  Are they looking for free advice on how to fuck up their country?  If so then they’re talking to the right man. Maybe he’ll tell reporters in London where the previous 700 billion dollars have gone too since it hasn’t done a goddamn thing for our economy.

Jesus Christ the middle class is getting fucked over ,but do you think they care?  Hell no.  They’re too busy jerking off over the Bible while watching Israel drop phosphorus bombs on innocent civilians every hour on Fox News…stupid fucking cum garglers.  I hope their children enjoy the taste of rich cock in their mouth because that’s the only thing they’ll be able to eat since their worthless parents did nothing while the government fucked them in the ass and took their money.

Are they fucking serious?

Israeli aircraft and troops continued their assault on Gaza Sunday, despite an Israeli official’s assessment that the two-week-old military operation may be in its final days.

Thirty-three Palestinians, including a pregnant woman, were killed in Gaza on Sunday, Palestinian medical sources said. Eight-hundred-ninety-eight people have been killed and 3,695 injured in Gaza since the start of fighting December 27, the sources said.

Forty-five percent of the dead were women and children, the sources said.

Who is Israel asking for patience?  Us?  Europe?  China?  Russia?  Germany?  Nobody will tell Israel what to do because they’re scared of being called anti-Semitic.  Whatever the fuck that means.  Why can’t they call people racist?  People who hate Blacks, Latinos, Asians, Afghans, Iraqis, Iranians, Cubans, Mexicans, Africans, Australians, French, British, and Eskimos are called racist but if you hate a Jew you’re anti-Semitic.  I don’t fucking understand that shit.

And fuck you CNN for spelling out the number of people dead.  Was it too difficult to type 889 people have been killed; 33 Palestinians including a pregnant woman have been killed; and 45 percent of the dead are women and children?  Or were you hoping people wouldn’t realize that 400 women and children  have been killed by the Israeli soldiers who are only suppose to be going after Hamas’ leaders?

But of course the United States will be patient.  I mean if it’s one thing our government loves, it’s slaughtering brown people in the Middle East…

I’m getting a tingling sensation in my groin area and I’m pretty sure it isn’t a STD.

Rocket attacks from Gaza have forced Israelis to flee in ever greater numbers, escalating the belief among Israel’s military chiefs that Hamas missiles could threaten the nation’s top secret nuclear facility at Dimona.

Israeli officials say that Hamas has acquired dozens of Iranian-made Fajr-3 missiles and with it, an even longer range than previously seen. Many fear that as the group acquires ever more sophisticated weaponry it is only a matter of time before the nuclear installation at Dimona, 20 miles east of Beersheba, falls within its sights.

Fuck yea.  Now that is a way to end a war.  Forget how the London Times and Fox News know where Israel’s top secret nuclear base is or how hypocritical Israel is to even have a secret nuclear base, if Hamas pulls this off it will be the greatest upset the world as ever seen.

Think about it, Israel is bombing the fuck out of the Gaza strip.  Shit they just used a 1 ton bomb that killed a leader of Hamas, his four wives and nine kids.  Why did they have to use a 1 ton bomb?  Fuck if I know. I’m guessing that the leader and his family had super human strength and could regenerate their health so Israel had to use a huge bomb to make sure they  killed them.   But I’m not a major or general or whatever the fuck they call a high ranking official in the military, so I don’t know.

But can you imagine the look on ever world leader’s face if Hamas  blows up Israel’s nuclear base?

The thought of a single missile fired from a Hamas solider as he is being shot at by seven Israeli soldiers and it lands on top of Israel’s nuclear base, which causes a gigantic chain reaction that blows up every nuclear missile that Israel is secretly hiding, which destroys Israel and forces them to surrender while causing radioactive fallout that kills everyone on the Gaza strip, gets my dick hard.

Hollywood couldn’t write a better ending for the world…

How many dicks did this man have to suck to become the 25th United States Ambassador to the United Nations because he makes Sarah Palin’s baby look like a genius.

Yesterday, on Fox’s Hannity and Colmes, Iran war hawk John Bolton said that Israel’s recent bombing campaign in Gaza is all the more reason for the United States to bomb Iran now. “So while our focus obviously is on Gaza right now, this could turn out to be a much larger conflict,” he said, adding that “we’re looking at potentially a multi-front war here.”

How can he expect people to take him seriously with a mustache like that? Look at it.  It looks like someone took a gray, fuzzy shit on his face and he doesn’t have the balls to wipe it off.  No wonder he has been calling for war with Iran for so long now, he’s pissed that Mahmoud Ahmadinejad has better facial hair than him.  Stupid bastard.

And why is it the only show that will speak to him is Hannity and Colmes?  Is it because everyone else knows how fucking stupid he is? Sorta like Sean Hannity….

Our government doesn’t like sex in America but they want to spread the love overseas.

In an effort to win over fickle warlords and chieftains in Afghanistan and get information from them, CIA officials are handing out Viagra pills in exchange for their cooperation, the Washington Post reports.

“Whatever it takes to make friends and influence people – whether it’s building a school or handing out Viagra,” an agency operative, speaking on the condition of anonymity, told the Post.

That’s right people, we have spent over one trillion dollars and sacrificed over 4,000 American lives so  men who can’t get it up in the Middle East can fuck.

Jesus Christ.

Do they really think this will help with the “War on Terror”?  Do they think those men are going to come together and say, “Guys, we might have been wrong about America.  They knew our dicks weren’t working and instead of taking away our heroin and forcing us to exercise, like they do to their own people, they’ve decided to give us a pill that allows us to stay hard up to four hours.  And it isn’t that cheap ass Cialis they’re always showing during Monday Night Football.  I say we just stop fight and start fucking.  Who’s with me?”

Our soldiers are fucked and you can except the number of their deaths to go up.  Why?  Because we’ve just told the entire world that the men we are fighting can’t get hard.  Do you have any idea how damaging that is to the male ego?  They are now the laughing stock of the world.

Plus this shows us how fucking stupid our government is.  They want us to believe that these evil, ruthless, godless men will someone how get a nuclear weapon on the black market and blow up a good portion of our great nation,  yet they don’t know where to go to get an erection pill?

Give me a fucking break.  Our “elected” officials are nothing more than  rich, arrogant, stupid, pussified, pieces of shit and they should be taken out back, skull fucked and shot at the base of the neck.

If there was a God this would happen but since there isn’t, I’ll settle for an underage sex sting…

Jesus just made the Christian Right cum in their pants.

Israel moved closer to invading Gaza, saying Thursday it had wrapped up preparations for a broad offensive after Palestinian militants fired about 100 rockets and mortar shells across the border in two days.

Fuck yea baby.  Jews versus Muslims.  Armageddon.  It’s about fucking time Pat Robinson, Jerry Falwell, Rob Parsley, John Hagee, Mike Huckabee, Glenn Beck, Bill O’Reilly, John McCain, George Bush, Sean Hannity, Dick Cheney, Sarah Palin, Ann Coulter, Rudy Giuliani, and Rush Limbaugh were right.

I want to see chaos.   I want to see Israelis soldiers beat the shit out of innocent Palestinians while suicidal Palestinians blow up innocent Israelis.  I want to see tanks and airplanes flying everywhere blowing shit up. I want to see houses burst into flames and bodies flying through the air.

Why?  Because I’m all for people blowing themselves up in the name of a peaceful, loving god.  Plus I want to see how the Right Wing will act.

I want to see them crowd around their brand new 47-inch LCD TV listening to whoever is on Fox News talk about how this is the end of the world. I want to see religious men struggle to run home with their pants around their ankles while they  masturbate so fast that their dicks start to smoke as they think about the destruction their God is doing.  I want to see female Sunday school teachers knuckle deep in their snatch as they get on their knees to tell God how proud they are of Him and ask Him to kill all those who don’t believe that He is the supreme ruler of the universe.

I want this to happen because I’m going to cum buckets when I see the look on a religious person’s face when he/she finally realize that their fucking God is a fake and they brought this stupid, fucking, petty war on themselves.

Then I hope they kill themselves because they’re worthless pieces of shit.  Stupid fucking cunts…