That’s what George Bush should of been handing out instead of stupid shit like this.  Now I won’t be able to turn on the TV without some religious asshole screaming “Abstinence  is the only way to go!!!“:

Students at a suburban St. Louis high school headed to the gymnasium for HIV testing this week after an infected person told health officials as many as 50 teenagers might have been exposed to the virus that causes AIDS.

Officials refused to give details on who the person was or how the students at Normandy High School might have been exposed, but the district is consulting with national AIDS organizations as it tries to minimize the fallout and prevent the infection — and misinformation — from spreading.

“There’s potential for stigma for all students regardless of whether they’re positive or negative,” Normandy School District spokesman Doug Hochstedler said Thursday. “The board wants to be sure all children are fully educated.”

How many students are fucking at that school? 50 people could be infected?  Jesus Christ. Has anyone heard of a condom?

Where are the parents at?  The only thing my dad would tell me going out as I walked out the door was “Don’t be a fool..cover your tool.” And that’s when we both knew the only thing I was fucking was my right hand. (Left if I wanted a taste of the wild side)

I bet that computer nerd who gets picked on for not fucking anyone is laughing his ass off while becoming a level 76 Dark Elf.

Let me be the first to slap your clammy, pale white hand and say…”Well done sir. You get to live another day.”

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Tags: AIDS, Condoms, Looks like I need to stop hitting on high school girls, Sex, Stupid Kids
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Because I’d hate dating Hitler…

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Tags: Hitler, Marriage, Pure, Sex, What the hell is this shit
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And to think Bush hated Saddam because he traded oil for favors.  Silly me. The Washington Post is reporting on how the Interior Minerals Management Service [Ed-what kind of fucking name is that?] traded money and sex for oil:

In the report released yesterday, investigators said they “discovered a culture of substance abuse and promiscuity” in which employees accepted gratuities “with prodigious frequency.” The report cited one e-mail from a Shell Pipeline representative asking a woman in the royalty office to attend “tailgating festivities” at a Houston Texans football game: “You’re invited . . . have you and the girls meet at my place at 6am for bubble baths and final prep. Just kidding.”

Besides Shell, the energy company employees mentioned in the report worked for Chevron, Hess and Gary-Williams Energy. The social outings detailed in the report included alcohol-, cocaine- and marijuana-filled parties where certain employees of the Minerals Management Service were nicknamed the “MMS Chicks” by the energy employees. The companies paid for federal workers to attend football and baseball games, PGA Tour events, Colorado ski trips, paintball outings and “treasure hunts,” investigators found.

Who the fuck wakes up at 6am for a Texan game? Really? 6am? I don’t care if every Playboy bunny is at my door butt-naked at 6am, I would tell them to wait their sexy ass in the living room while I get my beauty sleep. Also…what the fuck are “treasure hunts”? Those sound awesome. If I was in on this, I would tell the guys to keep the girls and produce more treasure hunts.

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Tags: Football, Oil, Republicans, Sex
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