Once again South Carolina shows the world how freaky its politicians are.

A deputy assistant attorney general who said he was on his lunch break when an officer found him with a stripper and sex toys in his sport utility vehicle has been fired, his boss said Wednesday.

Roland Corning, 66, a former state legislator, was in a secluded part of a downtown cemetery when an officer spotted him Monday, according to a police report obtained by The Associated Press under the Freedom of Information Act.

Now I know what you’re thinking, and no, this isn’t the best part of the article. This is the best part:

He then searched the SUV, where he found a Viagra pill and several sex toys, items Corning said he always kept with him, “just in case,” according to the report.

That’s what I’m talking about. You’ve always got to be prepared because you never know when some hot stripper wants you to take her to a cemetery and fuck her in the butt with an assortment of dildos. And you never know how long she wants to fuck so you have to have one Viagra pill just in case.

So can we cut Roland Corning some slack? I mean, sure he obviously had to pay this women to fuck him. And sure, he’s prosecuted plenty of people who’ve paid for sex. But this man is 66-years-old and he’s banging a 18-year-old woman while teasing her butthole with a couple of rubber dicks. He deserves our respect.

And I’m giving it to him. Because when I’m 66-year-old man I hope some 18-year-old woman is so hard up for money that she’s willing to swallow her pride by swallowing my dick.

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Tags: Republican, Roland Corning, Sex Toys, South Carolina, Stripper, The Man Is a Pimp
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