Fri 11 Sep, 2009
Yes, I know today is the eighth anniversary of 9/11. And yes, I know that 2,974 Americans died during 9/11. And yes, I know that our politicians, TV pundits, famous newspaper columnist, and famous radio personalities say we should never forget 9/11. But I want to put things into perspective.
So here is a list of things that have killed more Americans than 9/11:
- Prescription Drugs
- Aspirin
- Tobacco
- Televised Bowling
- Iraqi War
- Obesity
- Car crashes
- Alcohol
- Lifetime Channel
- Suicides
- Cancer
- Aids
- WNBA
- Heart Disease
- Handgun Accidents
- Suffocation
- Drowning
- Falls
- Grey’s Anatomy
Also, since 9/11, America is responsible for over 30,000 Iraqi civilian deaths and 20,000 Afghanistan civilian deaths.
So today while we beat our chest and proclaim to the world how we’re going to wipe those Muslim assholes off the face of the earth for attacking America, just remember this list and shut the fuck up.
Tags: 9/11, War on Terror, When are we going to declare a War on Cars
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